Saturday, 9 February 2013

The Closed Closet.

I sat down with my two friends
in the midst of people
in a crowded restaurant
these guys seem happy, overwhelmed.

I named them
one is M, the other is S.

M just reconciled
with his 3 months girlfriend
while S on the other hand
got a new girl
the first and let's hope the only one.

They were excitedly telling me
how they met S GF
just a while before
met her mother
so on and so forth.

Then they said
what they noticed
I looked sad
as in jealous or frustrated.

Insisting on me
telling the truth
about my status
or what was my status.

I kept silent
and forced a smile.

I was sad
and it makes me sad right even now
I want to love
be loved.

Yet I am confused, scared, timid!
Not sure of what I want,
between a pudding or a lollipop.

If it was up to me
I had spurt everything out instantly
telling them how miserable I truly am
suffering inside,
and torn bit by bit.

But I know I can't
I do not have the courage
or the trust in them
or in anyone else.

I pity myself
scared of honesty
for living hastily
shame on me.


  1. pilih lah yang terbaik untuk diri anda =)

  2. mmg sukar.. tak de yg mudah dalam hidup ini..
    CB, kita tahu naluri sendiri kan.. jangan kita sedih..
    ini semua ujian sebenarnya, just please be strong..

    and kalau boleh, and setakat mana yg mampu, keep it secret..
    jangan pernah berhenti berdoa.. ok ;)