Thursday, 17 May 2018

That Profound Loneliness

Last year of Ramadhan, I spent most iftars alone, in my room. After work, I would stopped at my uni’s bazaar, packed some food enough for me alone, went back home and wait for ifthar. That was mostly my everyday routine.

I am expecting this year to be the same. For example, today, the first day of Ramadhan will be me breaking fast alone. I was perfectly okay last year. But I guess the lonely is slowly creeping in. Because this year, I just don’t feel like eating alone, or even being alone.

When I was admitted to the hospital a few weeks ago, I could not stop  thinking that will be my future. I drove myself to the hospital, got admitted and had nothing on me the whole time I was in the hospital with only a few close friends who come to visit. I was sad because I was lonely. And because I know that future might be real for me. I guess I just need to get use of this profound loneliness and learn to live with it.

Happy Ramadhan and happy new government!


  1. Salam ramadan awak. semakin bertambah umur semakin kerap rasa ingin miliki seseorang semakin tinggi, namun apakah daya andai jodoh belum sampai kepada kita. take care.

  2. zaki, awak masih blogging lagi! tahniah!
    moga sentiasa sihat selamat dan sejahtera ya!